This page lists information about what you can make your situation safer if you are in an abusive relationship. For a worksheet on how to implement some of these precautions, a worksheet may be helpful.

>> Click here for a safety plan worksheet.

If you are in an abusive relationship:

• Think of a relatively safe place to go if an argument occurs - avoid rooms with no exits (bathroom), or rooms with weapons (kitchen).
• Think about and make a list of safe people to contact.
• Call the Shelter for Help in Emergency at 434-293-8509 and find out what help is available to you.
• Keep change with you at all times.
• Memorize all important numbers.
• Establish a "code word or sign" so that family, friends, teachers or co-workers know when to call for help.
• Think about what you will say to your partner if he/she becomes violent.
• Have a set of clothes for yourself and for your children stored at a friend's house or at work in the event you need to flee your house.
• Keep sets of important documents (savings account records, check books, safety deposit keys, birth certificates, school records, deeds, other legal documents) away from your house in a safe place that only you can access.
• Take pictures of physical injuries resulting from the abuse.
• Do emergency drills with your children. Teach them how to dial 911.
• If you have a protective order, carry it with you at all times. Make extra copies.
• Trust your own judgment and intuition. If a situation is serious, you may choose to give your partner what they want in order to calm them down and temporarily avoid escalation of the abuse. You have the right to protect yourself however you see fit.
• Remember you have the right to live without fear and violence.

If you have left the relationship:

• Change your phone number.
• Screen calls.
• Save and document all contacts, messages, injuries or other incidents involving the batterer.
• Change locks, if the batterer has a key.
• Avoid staying alone.
• Plan how to get away if confronted by an abusive partner.
• If you have to meet your partner, do it in a public place.
• Vary your routine.
• Notify school and work contacts.
• Call the Shelter for Help in Emergency at 434-293-8509.

If you leave the relationship or are thinking of leaving, you should take important papers and documents with you to enable you to apply for benefits or take legal action. Important papers you should take include social security cards and birth certificates for you and your children, your marriage license, leases or deeds in your name or both yours and your partner's names, your checkbook, your charge cards, bank statements and charge account statements, insurance policies, proof of income for you and your spouse (pay stubs or W-2's), and any documentation of past incidents of abuse (photos, police reports, medical records, etc.)